The first day
by Danym
Summary: Someone doesn’t show up for work. Warning: Angst [GSR] and OOC fic.


The first day

By Dany

Summary: Someone doesn't show up for work.

Rating: K

A/N: This is a short piece of Angst and OOC. But the idea was intriguing and didn't leave me alone until I wrote it down. This is my first real piece of Angst, so constructive criticism is welcome.

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI.

xxxxx

The first day he didn't come to work, she wasn't concerned. Maybe she had even expected it. The others found it odd, but didn't comment on it, and everything went its way.

The second day he didn't come to work, she was a bit surprised. She didn't think he could hold out that long without work, but obviously he could. The others were starting to get really worried, trying to call him. He did not answer. They wanted to go and visit him, but in the end they decided their company would not be appreciated, so they let it go and returned to work.

The third day he didn't come to work, she was wondering if she had done the right thing. She had thought he would be back by now. He wasn't. This time, when the others discussed his absence, she started to squirm lightly, worry beginning to seep into her. They tried to call him, but again, no answer. They decided that, his non-appreciation be damned, they would check on him. One of them was chosen – she was relieved it wasn't her – to stop by his house and see if he was there. He wasn't. The lights had been out, the whole place locked up. They were really worried now. She was wondering harder if she had done the right thing.

The fourth day he didn't come to work, she was concerned. This, she had not expected. The others were beside themselves with worry, calling again and again, asking around who had seen him. Nobody had. They still did their work, but they lacked the spirit.

The end of the fourth day came and found her alone in a corner, crying at what she had done. She had done the one thing she promised him she would not.

xxxxx

It had been a stupid idea, but in an hour of desperation, Sara Sidle didn't see any other way. She worked on the details for a week before she was satisfied and confident that her plan would work. Looking back, she couldn't tell why she had thought that this was a good idea. Maybe because she had never planned for it to go that far.

At first, everything had been going according to the plan. A piece of evidence planted here, another there, and she could see the effect it was having on him.

Him – Gil Grissom, the man of her dreams.

And still, she had hurt him bad. How bad, she didn't know yet because he was nowhere to be found.

It had started when he refused to listen to her. At least that's what she told herself. In truth, it had started much earlier, when a wish was born in her heart.

That was it; it was born in her heart, not her head. Thoughts had not really been involved, and maybe that was the reason it had gone so wrong.

At first, there were only small things that made her sit up and take notice, but over time, her desire grew. It grew to a size where she couldn't control herself anymore, and she had told Grissom.

He had rejected her.

He had told her that he could not, would not, fulfill her wish and tried to explain it. He tried to tell her that it was a risk he couldn't take, because in the end, it would only hurt her more than his rejection.

She had been so hurt that she couldn't think straight anymore and thus her plan was born.

To achieve what she wanted she had sunk low, so low that she hated herself for it. It was done and she couldn't undo the damage.

xxxxx

The day before he didn't come to work, he had finally confronted her. It was a confrontation she had been waiting for for days. She should have feared it.

"You promised me you wouldn't." His voice was maddeningly calm as he delivered the line she had been working for.

Before she answered, she swallowed hard. Now that the moment was there, she suddenly didn't feel so good anymore. "You left me no choice."

"We always have a choice." He kept his distance, and when she tried to move closer, he stepped back.

There was a distance building between them, and she was wavering in her conviction that this was only for their best.

"You didn't even listen to me and it's something that I need to do." She was getting defensive although she had sworn she wouldn't.

"Goodbye."

That was the last word she heard from him before he walked out the door.

It took a moment before she recovered from the shock, but then she ran after him.

She caught him in the parking lot and yelled at him. "It isn't the way you think. Please, Gil."

He didn't even turn around.

"Gil, I didn't do it. I just…"

The car door was pulled shut and she could see him staring at her, the pain in his eyes clear for her to see. She had done more than just hurt him.

xxxxx

The fifth day, she didn't come to work.

She stayed at home, wondering how she could fix this.

The whole night she was up analyzing why she had tried to make him believe she was seeing another man. And not only that.

Why was her wish to have a family so important to her, important enough to sacrifice her relationship with Grissom?

It was illogical because without Grissom, she couldn't do it anymore.

Grissom was all she ever wanted. She wanted him so much that the desire to start a family, have a child with him, was stronger than anything else. She didn't care about the consequences of his defect; she just wanted a connection between them.

Her desire to have more than she already had had probably cost her everything.

If only he was here, if only she could make him understand, if only she could tell him that it was all just a ploy.

Contrary to the evidence she had planted herself, she had not cheated on him. She just wanted him to make a decision, or at least to talk to her.

In that fateful hour of desperation, she had thought that if he saw how serious she was, he would come to her and talk, maybe even give in.

Of course, life did not work that way. It was no soap opera where the characters used such a ploy to perfection and always got what they wanted.

Life was real.

And Grissom was gone.

xxxxx

The sixth day, they both didn't come to work.

The seventh day, two letters reached the lab.

The end


End file.
